Saturday, March 8, 2014

Muse dream with a Mozart ending (Warning: adult language)

I was sleeping in my dorm room. I awakened to the sound of someone getting in bed next to me. I could've pretended to stay asleep, but I wanted to know who was here and why. I turned and saw that it was Beth, one of my best friends from college. She and my senior year college roommate, Jennifer, were coming back from some kind of gathering. Then I remembered--it was Jennifer's birthday and I'd missed her party. But I was sick and hadn't been feeling well, hence my being in bed. It was dark outside and I tried to read the alarm clock. I think it said it was 5:30 in the morning. They had been partying hard, and they weren't done yet. Apparently they were just taking a break, and were returning shortly to play some kind of game. I was feeling better (and also feeling left out) and wanted to help celebrate Jennifer's birthday. So I asked what kind of game they were playing. They explained, and I decided to join them.

The game was being played in a large symphony hall with the usual slanted floors that went lower as you got to the stage. It involved using controllers that looked and felt just like real guitars. Apparently the game was kind of like Guitar Hero but with an actual band and orchestra on stage. The band on stage was Muse, much to my delight. A lot of my friends were there, including Julia, another best friend. Most of the players were in the audience (or maybe they were just spectators?) but for some reason I was on stage in front of the orchestra, stage right. I was being silly and dancing around like some rock guitarists do. It caught the attention of Matt (Muse's guitarist) and he smiled at me. This made me happy to no end, and I gyrated more with my guitar controller.

At one point, Matt and Dom (Muse's drummer; but if you know me at all, you already knew that) were yelling out something about someone named "Grace." They were doing it in time to the music and it was pretty funny. Julia, who is a relatively new Muse fan, asked me "Who's Grace?" She was pretty far away from me so I mouthed to her "She's a fan of the band." She couldn't understand me, so I mouthed it again. I didn't want to actually yell it because the music was very loud.

When the game was over, I didn't want to leave. I also wanted an excuse to get near the band and ask them where they were hanging out after they were done with this (apparently they were rehearsing with the orchestra for something). Morgan, the guy the band hires to play with them when they tour, was stage right (which is odd because in real life, he's always stage left), sitting at an upright piano (what, no grand?!). I noticed someone's guitar controller on the floor and saw my chance. I picked up the white guitar with black control knobs and looked for a stage hand to give it to. I found one, and mentioned that I found it and thought I should turn it in. The guy took it, and now was my chance because I was only a few steps away from Morgan. I screwed up my courage, and just then the conductor of the orchestra spotted me.

The conductor stopped the rehearsal and called me out. He yelled at me, saying that I was disrupting the rehearsal and bothering the band members. He humiliated me in front of my peers in the audience, the orchestra (which included colleagues of mine), and my favorite band on the planet. I turned to see Morgan looking right at me, a mix of anger and pity on his face.

I'd had it. The conductor was completely out of line and blew things way out of proportion. I stormed to the front of the stage, turned to the conductor, and yelled at the top of my lungs "You...are an asshole!" The audience met my outburst with rousing applause. I bowed graciously, then exited stage right. They continued applauding as I walked up the center aisle of the auditorium. Once I got to the top (the entrance to the hall), I had a wonderful idea. I swung open the doors, leaned over, and stuck my butt out toward the direction of everyone on stage, a la Mozart in the film Amadeus. I think I also shook my butt a bit for good measure. I was met with more applause as I left the hall.

Once outside the hall, I saw people seated around the area. I told several groups of them what had happened as I walked by and they all met me with smiles and pats on the back. I felt vindicated, and it felt good.

The End.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Robyn, I sent you a message on Google plus about your interpretation of the music Shipping Up To Boston, once I'm not sure if you got the message I'm also sending to you on this post. Would you be kind to answer me please. Regards.

    ReplyDelete